Here we go again. Another night of fighting to get my little one to bed. I've tried everything and nothing works. Consequences. Rewards. Yelling. Encouragement. Shaming. Nurturing. It's no use. Going to bed without a fight isimpossible in this house.


Bedr 1
When I put my daughter to bed I am feeling tired and worn out from my day. My patience and tolerance are low and some nights I have a headache. My daughter is cranky and cries even at the mention of bedtime. She kicks and screams all the way up the stairs. She has a hard time winding down before bed, but she has to get to sleep by 8:30 or she's a grump in the morning. The way she hangs on to me makes me think she's scared or is just trying to delay falling asleep. Her room is pretty dark and she has a shadow of a tree by her window that might be a little scary for her. I notice that its cold in her room too.

Tonight when we start our bedtime routine I am going to be conscious of my tiredness and pain in my body so that this doesn't get in the way of bedtime. I will remind myself that I will be in bed soon but for that time it will be more helpful to focus on helping my daughter feel safe, warm, and relaxed before bed. I will not "fight" back because it doesn't help.
Bedr 1
I will turn the TV off 20 minutes before bed so that we can start to wind down together. I will soften my voice and talk quietly with her as a way to communicate that it's time to relax and quiet ourselves. If she kicks and screams I will acknowledge what she is showing me--"you really do not want to go to bed." Then I will stop so that I can better understand what is going on for her. If she can't tell me I will listen to her behavior to inform me. I will be gentle with her, even when she tries to resist or fight me. I will put an extra blanket on her bed and let her plug her nightlight in the plug that she chooses. I will acknowledge any fear she has and reassure her that she is safe, with a few extra hugs if she wants them.



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